Horoscope for 11-12-10

Here is my horoscope for today...I have a few comments.

The hard work and detail-oriented planning you have done lately is really starting to pay off, Shannon. The key today is to maintain your sensitivity and look to where you can be of service to others. The nurturing side of you is feeling the need to express itself in a helpful manner. Follow your heart and be respectful of your emotions. The thing you need to be most aware of is to not overextend yourself too much.

First, they pegged me on the detail-oriented...I'm a bitch about details.  You have to have details in order to do things.  Vague mumblings are not helpful nor acceptable.  I want to know what the plan is.

Second, I don't think I'll maintain my sensitivity since I don't really have that.  Not to mention that I don't want to be of service to others.  I'm in it for me...  OK, I take that back.  The whole point of my 12-step program is to be of maximum service to God and others.  That is what the big book tries to teach up.  So I have to walk through the day, holding out my hand.

Third, the nurturing side needs to express itself?  I might be sensitive but I most definitely am not nurturing.  Not by any stretch of the imagination.  I actually will recoil when asked to be loving and kind.  Most people seem to sense this and so I'm not really asked to nurture anyone.  I can shake a hand and sometimes hug but I will not be sitting at your bedside when you're sick...mopping your brow...

Fourth, respectful of my emotions?  I don't think that's going to happen.  I don't respect your emotions...why respect mine.  I think it's more that I don't trust emotions.  Emotions happen without warning and are rarely the same each time.  And how do you deal with emotions?  I didn't get a cheat sheet with my sobriety and I doubt I'll be able to pick one up at Borders.

Fifth, do not overexert yourself....I am kind of two different people here.  I will overexert myself when it's something I feel strongly about.  But what happens most of the time is that I'll start something and then quickly get bored, tired or fed up and then I'll just half ass it.  Really, I like to half ass half ass...I used to be gunho about things.  I'd step in and try to solve the problems of everyone involved.  I wanted to fix you.  I definitely overexerted myself but I lived off that.  It was a "high" that I would get for being the savior.

Now, I just want to be mediocre  I just want to do the bare minimum.  I don't ask for the hard assignments. I don't spend hours each night, working on projects. I don't run around and try to run the whole shebang.  I just want to go home, read a little, maybe watch a movie and work on craft projects.

The lesson of this horoscope post is this...this sensitiveless, nonnurturing, unemotional, detail orientated person will try harder to be more sensitive of others, initiate more nurturing interactions, start expressing my emotions and wade less in the details; give of my time and talents.

But then I think people would have a hard time with a newer, softer Shannon.  Guess I have to work on my PR.

Horoscope 11/5/10

I think someone actually puts a camera in my house, car and work and then sends me cryptic messages disguised as horoscopes.  Most of the time they are crap and useless, I deleted them right away.  But just enough make me wonder and I think they saw me get dressed today...

Here's my horoscope for the day:

From time to time we all have to take a hard look at our lives to see where we are going. But when you think about your life an inner voice tends to criticize you Shannon. Today you feel that your life is far from being the way you think it should be. Try not listening to this voice or try to prove it wrong.

For some reason, the committee of 12 in my head is telling me to jump ship.  Not just from one thing or another but to jump off the Titanic, you have a better chance of surviving in the freezing cold water...with SHARKS!!!

Have I ever mentioned sharks terrify the shit out of me?  No?  Well, they do.  This picture actually terrifies me.  Makes me what to poop my pants. And I'm not kidding. I can't look directly at it, out of fear.  I refuse to watch Shark Week, it literally makes me cry. 

The biggest thing about this fear is that it is totally irrational.  I live in KANSAS....no sharks in Kansas.  BUT...there might be one in a lake or river.  Any standing body of water.  If I can't see the bottom, my bottom is not getting in it.  Period.  Maybe when I was drinking but not as a sober human being.  If I am close to water, like in a boat or something.  I'm in the middle of boat, away from the sides because those fuckers can LEAP out of the water and take a man down...I want no part of that.  So I tend to just NOT go on the water.  So far, I haven't missed anything.  I don't get 3rd degree sunburns by sitting in a cabin or under a tree.  I don't puke at the end of the day because I've ingested 2 kegs worth of beer.  And I haven't had to compete with other women to show off my tits...overall, I think I have the better afternoon.

I had to take the picture out while I was typing this.  The picture is just too graphic for me.

So back to the point of this horoscope blog that has gone so terribly wrong.  I want to jump ship because it just seems like it would be so much easier then actually doing anything else.  I have a kitchen full of dishes, my craft room is now a small 8th wonder of the world and I have vacuumed 3 times because my bastard dogs are not done shedding yet.  And I have 18 projects I have to get done in the next month and a half.  I have SHIT TO DO....and I am finding myself doing everything but those things. 

I have a group of people coming over tomorrow.  It has been my goal all week to get my house straightened out just enough to actually feel comfortable with them there.  A week....I picked up my living room because Crawford came over last night. I know she wouldn't have cared what it looked like but I was embarrassed.  not embarrassed enough to actually clean. I merely transplanted that stuff to the craft room.  I'm thinking of going and buy hazard tape and putting it across my whole craft room so no one would get hurt if they waded in.

Mr Burke is also coming over (and he'll meet some friend and family - poor guy).  So that means I have to clean upstairs; my bedroom.  .  My bedroom has not had a visitor for awhile so it's been eye opening to see what I have been living like for 3 years.

With all of this said, my house is not really dirty, just disheveled.  I'm not big on cleaning because it's just me.  But, since I'll have company on a more frequent basis, I've got to take a stance now to get it in shape so it's just easier to maintain on a regular basis. I used to be RIGID about cleaning when I was married.  Sunday was the day to clean house and I would take about 4 hours.  But that was a 4 bedroom 2.5 bath house with a semi-finished basement.  And a dog that loses more hair in a week then I do in a year.  She is seriously a shedder.  Sunday was also the day I would go through the house and straighten all the pictures and paintings.  I was trying to channel Martha Stewart...

BUT....I am not a hoarder.

That is a lot of shit.

 



And to just prove it...

I finally got through my emails for today and this was my horoscope...hmmm....

You have been very busy telling other people what to do, Shannon. Why are you criticizing and thundering about so? Could it be that you are dissatisfied with yourself at the moment? Could it be that your job is causing you some problems, or that your entourage is being too intense these days? When you get into moods like this, you know the source is often internal. So stop telling other people what to do and start to think about what you should do.

They never get it right

My horoscope for the day....if this said the exact opposite, I'd believe it.  Besides....I have no love life, in or out of the bedroom.

Remember to allow the organized piece of your being to spill over into every aspect of your life, Shannon. It could be that you are fine at keeping your finances, your home, and your work situation orderly and under control, but when it comes to love, all sense of rationalization goes out the window. Make sure you are as disciplined with yourself in the bedroom as you are in your office.


What the hell do they know?